How Apryl Jones Navigated Grief, Alcohol Recovery, and Mental Healing

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Welcome to Lesson 1% podcast. Today I have a special treat. I'm actually on site in Chicago at the Hilton. Um we're

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doing uh as a participant and also I guess some kind of

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one of the originators. You are of the brilliance uh event. And April,

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you came. Yes. uh and gave a lot of knowledge and inspiration to a lot of leaders and you

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know there so many people here people who um and you know we'll get to your story but

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there's so many people who are just starting out right they're just starting out they don't know what they're going to do they kind of feel like they want to impact

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the world and then there's some people who have been doing it for a while that are just stale right and you know they're just bogged down with

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everything so I appreciate you um but I'm going to I'm going to because we I

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kind of cheated and already saw you on stage and already heard some of your stuff. We'll get to it, but I'm going to cheat and go right to

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the heart of a question. So, we ask everybody on the podcast, okay, a question and it's what's your superpower?

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Now, now I I'll let you think while I ramble. It can't be I'm on time. It can't be I'm a good friend. It can't

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It has to be something that only you can do. And when you do it, you have all the

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energy in the world. So, it has to be something unique to you. You can't just be something regular.

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It can't be something regular. Yeah. Yeah.

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So, let me let you think. Oh, like uh uh can I say like I don't know. Well, just say it. Don't you don't have

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to. Yeah. Don't edit it. You you um my superpower is that I'm a mirror reflector. That Okay, explain tell me more. um that

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whoever I encounter or that if I if I have the opportunity to

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outside of surface being like getting to know like if I was to get to know you past beyond the sur the surface if I

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spent enough time with someone I'm able to kind of show people the things that they're they're most afraid of

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um that they run away from um by talking about my life and me being vulnerable

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that they feel safe enough to kind of speak about their lives and then also see how they should kind of move in this

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life and what opportunities they've missed or you just got super deep like I was I was trying to make you go deep but this is

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deeper than I so I feel like I've been that to people and sometimes it's always not served me well I've lost people in my life because of

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that but then I've also I've seen what good I've I've done too so

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yeah so so you you think ma making people recognize things that they wouldn't normally recognize Yeah. And

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living this life really for like to the fullest, right? Because I think a lot of fear resides in a lot of us with a lot

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of things. And so if I can be that to call out that dynamic, if I see that within you

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and I see more in the potential, I'm going to say it. Do you have a base energy? Let me

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explain. Okay. I was like, hold on. I don't know what that mean. Yeah. I'm going I'm going deep. You went deep. So now I'm deep deep in it.

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So like my base energy is anger. My base energy is anger. When I'm angry, okay, I get super efficient. I get dialed in.

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I'm like like I can do I can stay up for 3 days and do do stuff. I know my base. Okay. What's your base?

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Surviving. Wow. Okay. Yeah. Don't explain. Explain. Um I think that I operate the best in

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certain areas where I know that I have to like I just have to survive. Like there is no quitting. There is no giving

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up. There is no making excuses. There is no punking out. There is no letting

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someone defeat me. Even if I don't think I'm going to be the greatest at something, which is cool because I'm

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okay with humbling myself because I know I'm not, I'm still going to be great at whatever it is that I do even in that failure.

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So, I do believe like surviving being in a space where I've come from nothing. I mean, I was raised on the projects of

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Cincinnati. I wasn't raised by my mom or my dad when I was younger. And having to come out of that and to see who I am now

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and how much love I have to give to people and I could have completely turned out to be the opposite is like a

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real testament. Wow. So we already have another connection cuz I went to school in in the in the nasty in the nasty in the

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nasty natty. Yeah. I remember I lived on I lived right by the zoo. Okay. So I lived on North Legged.

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Okay. Uhhuh. Valley homes. I never knew that they had different species of roaches in Cincinnati the way

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they do. They got the big ones that do the that do the push-ups. They do. And then they got the little itty bitty.

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They do. And I was raised with the roaches. And you eat White Castle still? Mhm.

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Do you really eat it or you just I really eat it? You like You like it? Mhm. I like the number one the four

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cheeseburgers with the French fries and um the cheese sauce and a Coca-Cola on the bed of onions. Oh my goodness.

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I really do actually like I'm I'm a fan of It Tears my stomach up. I'm not going to lie. Yeah. But it's worth it.

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Yeah. So, so I love I love your philosophy. Of course, I'm you know, I

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went and biopsied you. You know, I did the I did the Graham and I did the, you know, the history just to try to

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understand you a little bit better. But you believe in you're not I love the way you view health care as

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more health, right? Yes. Because I'm always trying to tell people health care is when you're sick. like how can you

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bring you know healthy habits and healthy mindset so that you don't get sick by the time you need me as a doc

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it's too late so what what what made you focus on health oh um as I was sharing you know at your

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event um you know health has always been important for me just from the mental standpoint of like working out it I've

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realized it releases aggression but I really feel like when I lost my

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dad was when I saw how unhealthy I truly was. You know, I think I had been

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masking a lot of things in my life, like a lot of the anger, the resentment, the frustration, all the trauma, the wounds

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that I had experienced as a kid. It came out when he passed because I realized, oh, I don't have another opportunity to

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it was done. What's done is done, right? And so I realized at that moment like,

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all right, it's um you and this bottle, right? And so I had a relationship with

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alcohol, a very close one. And it scared me. It scared me a lot. And I

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could see myself when I looked at myself in the mirror, it was gray. My eyes was yellow, you know, because I had been

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drinking. And I was like, you know, you got to make a real decision here. Like cuz you about to die. Like it it it got to that.

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So I felt like at that moment I chose my health. I chose me. I chose to show up

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for my children differently, right? And I was like, okay, like grieving is a normal part of life,

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right? Um, but this can't this can't be the way out. You know, you're

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you you're open with that. Yeah. Very open with that. Is that is that purposeful? Do you are

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you open with that because it helps you uh you know remember that time? Cuz it

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I kind of with all the the hurt that I feel from you now with that time. Yeah.

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Knowing my personality, I wouldn't want to tell anybody. Well, I think it's it also can help someone to um and I think

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it it it would allow someone to not feel alone and to know that it's okay to have those moments where you do choose the

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bottle and it's okay to be human, but it's also

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okay to feel that for a bit but not make the excuse to stay stuck there. And so, if my story can inspire someone to

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really choose a better healthy way of living for oneself, um because again, I

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am in the in the medical field. So, who am I to sit here and say to people get, you know, get right and health is this

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and and I'm not really living that. I I believe that I have to be a product of that. And I don't have a problem

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speaking about my life and what I've gone through. I think we're human beings. And I think that all of this is

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a part of life. Yeah. And, you know, I didn't know how I was going to respond to my dad passing and

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it was awful, but a lot of good came out of it. Like, I'm the most healthiest that I've ever

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been. I can sit here and speak with you now at this brilliance event and be around other women who are um incredible

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and share my story amongst these women and you know because I've chosen to

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commit to to health. The lineup is the lineup today was crazy. I I every time I listen to

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somebody I was like okay you know that's that's cool you know got that knowledge and then somebody else would drop something and you would drop something.

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But I was gonna ask you Yeah. to um you know because I don't really have a

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lot of backstory on brilliance and like kind of essentially what got you and led you into this because I saw you on stage

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and he you are very emotional about what it is that you do, you know, like you were

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speaking and you almost were in tears and so I did I did and you you know that

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you know that moment where you paused like Yes. and having to recalibrate that comes from somewhere. So I'm curious to know

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like what led you into this and then what is that that emotion that you have so deep? Yeah. So I'm a I mean I you know I'm I'm

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I think so I'm Jamaican. So okay y'all know how to I mean you know we just we out there and so for me

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um I think I'm emotional person, you know, like like we talked a little bit. I've been through a roller coaster of

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experiences um just like you have. Yeah. And they they all come together to make you who who you are. M

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but when you're going through them, you don't really understand them. And uh you know, I think I'm in a space right now

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where again, you know, just to be honest, there's not a lot of black people, not a lot of women, there's not a lot of

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diversity in general. Yeah. And I walk in the room still, and that's why I wrote a book about it. I mean, I walk in the room still

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and I don't know. I'm I feel like I I'm You see my personality.

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Yeah. I belong everywhere. like I sure nobody has to make me belong, but I know that they're looking at me

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sideways and so um so I can imagine and maybe I'm maybe I'm projecting, you know, I got a

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19-year-old daughter who's amazing. You know, she she's plays basketball at Boston College. She's she

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wants to go to medical school. She's got EQ. My son is amazing, too. But I know that for women, she's going to encounter

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some situations. Mhm. That people are going to treat her a certain way, not because of the content

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of her character, but because she's female and because she's a black female on top of that. And remember, my base

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energy is anger. And so I want to kill those. Oh, wait. Maybe. No, no, no. Don't come after me,

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folks. But I mean, that's a real feeling. Yeah. So the feeling so you know when I was talking about brilliance and Tenil

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and I you know I brought it to Tanal and I said I want to do this and it was weird because I'm a dude like why are you want to do this? I said because I

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really feel like the future of healthcare is is female is women. Yeah. Um you all as women are more in tune to

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your mental health, your physical your screenings like all of the things that you guys do. We men typically work and

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die. Mhm. We only get care usually when, you know, something goes wrong. And so,

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so that's why I really wanted to do it. And when I was up there, I didn't expect it. We also didn't know how how many people were going to come. And we saw

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the registrations. Yeah. Um, you know, we're working with you, you know, trying to get the different people there, the amazing people. And

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then finally, I saw the room and it's like there's 250 women here who are all glued to what y'all were talking about.

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And then I also got the messages that the messages that you all said as I was speaking or you know they're sort of

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coming through me and yeah I lost it but then I'm mad at myself. I was raised old school and dudes aren't

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supposed to cry and so as soon as I started the tear I don't think the tear came. No I fought me and the tear fought.

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Yeah I I could feel it but I'm like man if it it was really nice to see that you know emotion with how much this

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means to you. Cuz just like you said when you said you could help people if at the end of the day we just impact one

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person's life like you know a lot of people like I want to impact 100,000 people a million people it's just one if

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one person that watches this changes direction it's worth it.

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Yeah. And you showed a picture of how you want that to that to look you know the diversity and that was what was in

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that room. Yeah. So you're doing it. you know, I just want to give you your flowers while I'm sitting here cuz I think he's incredible

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and I'm just happy that I was brought in to be able to speak to some of these doctors.

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You know, they're they were great. I mean,

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no, I appreciate it. I appreciate it. I think I think honestly though, I think and you tell me I know you walk through the halls and talk to different people.

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I think people surprised by your story. I think they were surprised by how connected you are to healthcare. Um, and

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you obviously you have amazing energy, but I think it's I think it's more than just, you know, they saw that connection.

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Well, I will say this. A lot of people came to me because, you know, they've watched me on reality TV and they're like, "Girl, wait a minute, honey. You

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in healthcare. Can we take a picture?" I'm like, "Yeah, come on." And then, you know, we had the banter and they're like, "I did not know that." I'm like,

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"It's so interesting." And I never meant, you know, I don't ever want to on any of the reality because it's

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a blessing. But they never show that. I was pregnant and working while I was filming that show, you know

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what I mean? Providing for my family, you know? So, it's just crazy to me that

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like why would you not want to show what is a positive thing as a black woman who

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is really doing something who went to school and I'm not just some face on TV,

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right? They made me look like I was just somebody's girlfriend and you know that's fine. I can be that too. But I am

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I have a level of success. I've worked hard to get to where I'm at. Um and so it was really cool to hear these women just say like, "Yo, we're

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proud of you. Like we didn't even know." And like I feel like I belong because I live in LA, you know, it's entertainment

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and so I, you know, and I work in an outpatient center, so I have my tribe in the outpatient center, but this feels

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really nice to be able to have dialogue with all sorts of women who are involved

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in healthcare. Um, but yeah, it made me smile because I got to hear a lot of really nice positive things from people

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that did not they they even told me, you know, we placed you in the box, too. We did not know. Well, I mean, since we're

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being vulnerable, you placed me in a box. No. Oh, no. I And

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that's why that's what I wanted when we talked about, you know, talked to Melissa about you coming. Yeah.

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It made it made a lot of sense to me. And some people were like, "How does this fit?"

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How does this fit? And the reason just the fact that they asked that made me more motivated to say, "You need to come

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and talk." Because if they're asking how does that fit, that means that they already have an idea. And how many times

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have we come up there on that stage? I've been in this hotel like eight times. Um, giving information to people

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about healthcare and nothing moving the dial. You can say one thing now for

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whatever reason that people grab on to you and hold on to you that maybe is not

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as fruitful as you say as maybe a conversation here. Yeah. But you have the pulse of people. If you

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said right now you need to go get screenings for X or whatever. Yeah. They would go do it. Yeah. They would go do it. And that's the p

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the piece that I think healthcare is missing is we're we live in this silo. But we don't look at these other

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aspects. And you know what? Reality TV, hey, some people love it, some people hate it. But if somebody says something

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on reality TV, people are going to follow that trend. They're going to follow that trend. And so why can't we create those same trends

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for positive than it is, you know, for maybe some of the negative reasons. So that's I mean that's why I thought you know you know

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when you think about what we do um we're really bringing people together that probably don't go to the other

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you know what I mean Hollywood and and doing an ultrasound. Mhm. But I mean I I mean when I went I was

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standing outside of work and I did that video was a quick video you know not even knowing that it was going to go viral really just speaking about like

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hey I'm back in the working field. I love what I do. I'm working with patients right now. All these things. And then the video went viral. People

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are like, "Wait a minute, you're working." And oh, and you know, of course, you get some people that are like, "Well, she ain't got no money."

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See, D. And it's like, it has nothing to do with that. Like, I actually like what I do.

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So, you you started a company though, right? Did you start right at the pandemic? I read something that you were doing like ultrasounds and

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Yeah. So, I ended up um kind of merging with the midwife who delivered my babies. Yeah.

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So, um she has a practice called Graceful Birthing. And so we would just take patients, you know, people who just

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needed ultrasounds or people who were sick, we would give IVs, all sorts of stuff. We were running that clinic

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during that time because healthcare was important and people weren't able to get into the certain hospitals with

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everything that was going on. Um, and you know, people were pregnant during that time. Yeah. You know, it was a scary time for

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people. So, we gave back to the community, no charge, all the things. She would just call me, hey, I need you to do these scans. Hey. And I'm like,

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"Do you ever find anything?" Like, you ever do a scan and look at it? You're like, "Yeah,

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I don't." Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know what it is, but it ain't right. Yeah, for sure. But for sure. So, I

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worked at Northwestern Memorial, right? And I studied under Dr. Ellen Mlesson, who was like the breast guru. And um at

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first she was really hard on me, really hard. And then she started to see that I had an eye for the things that I saw.

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And a lot of times she trusted my instinct. And a lot of those times what I found was definitely breast cancer.

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And so I'm so grateful to her for her level of trusting me um and believing in

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my eye cuz it really takes a skill to to do synography. But yeah, there have been

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times when I'm like I just know it and I I have that gut feeling and I'm like I think we do need to biopsy. I think she's like and I'm like no, I think we

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we should really do that. And she's done it and she comes back and she's like what the heck?

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And so she would ask me to Yeah. and then she would just ask me to stay afterwards and be like, "No, I'd rather her kind of sit in with me or so, um,

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yeah, I'm grateful to her for that training and for that time."

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So, 20 years from now, right? 20 years

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from now, what does what does that look like? I mean, if you had to predict or if you had to say, you know, here's the trajectory for

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April, what would what would that look like? Um, I think I really want to start doing

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more of this, like speaking to the younger the younger kids and people in

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colleges and because by that time I should be retired from certain things. I would hope and I hope I ain't telling

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y'all my age, but um I I definitely want to get to a place where I'm just inspiring.

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Yeah. and building up the world because I feel like we are in some times and things are changing and like I feel like

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we're losing empathy for one another and compassion for each other and human connection feels like it's just being

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pulled further and further apart. I mean, we're stuck in our phones. I watch people that sit at restaurants that don't even talk to their families. Like,

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I just think it's important that we kind of find that way back to, you know, integrating human connection.

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Yeah. Yeah, I think it's I think it's huge and and it's funny how when you do talk to somebody, you know, we talked

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Cincinnati just boom just off a conversation or you know, Jessica Shepherd, Toronto, like all of a sudden

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you have these connections with people and you realize that they're actually real, right? And then, you know, it's funny like

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I'm in so many different spaces. I have healthcare, you know, you know, big- time healthcare leaders, um, athletes,

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right? You know, football players, basketball, then entertainers. And it's like when you when you sift through it,

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we're we're all just regular people looking to make impact really, you know, and I think sometimes we get

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lost in our roles and our titles. Yeah. And lose that, too.

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Yeah. So, when did you feel like you you wanted to be I mean, I know you

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obviously want to make an impact like you said, but like that you knew that this was because we were talking before

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the cameras went on about how you were, you know, you thought you were going to be doing music, you know, you and then that fell

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through and then you now are doing this. So, like did you just allow yourself to just be free in how life panned out for

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you or were you just like, okay, this didn't work and now I know I have to do this, that, and the other. So my superpower is relentlessness,

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you know. So I'm, you know, my claim to fame is that I'm never I never feel the

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best at anything, the prettiest, the tallest, you know, but I feel like I can outwork you. It's the Jamaican in me.

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And so I think that a lot of the stuff I do, what I realize, um, it's like I tell my my kids, I'm not

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going to decide what you do. Yeah. But I get to decide how you do it. And so that's what I think happened. I

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mean, I was, you know, growing up in Toronto just like, you know, everybody else. And Toronto's an interesting place

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because there was there's no super super super poor, but everybody's an immigrant. Everybody's grinding. And so,

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you don't really have much. And so, yeah, I thought I was going to be a rapper. I thought I was my name was

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my stage name was uh Rebel Kim, you know. Yeah, I was going I was going half

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Rockim, half Busta, you know. Uh but then and and the guys that raised me

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Mhm. they really raised me. They're all 10 years older than me. So it's all the production, you know, producer,

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AR, manager. I'm hanging with these cats and I'm I'm like 15, 14, and these guys are 25,

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which that's a big age difference. I'm going I'm going to clubs with them. I'm doing shows with them. Um but then, you know, it just kind of I

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didn't get signed. It was close to getting signed by Arista. Mhm. Then they kind of bailed on me because like as a Toronto act, this is pre

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pre-Drake, pre weekend, pre all these guys. And then I was uh so I was playing

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basketball at the same time. Mhm. Then I kind of was like, well, I want I want to play basketball when I'm short.

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Um so I kind of dove into that, ended up playing in college and then I played basketball relentlessly.

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Yeah. And then all of a sudden I was like, I'm not this is not going to be a profession. Like I'm not. And so I went

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into medicine, but it wasn't like, you know, those people like, "Oh, I'm gonna be a doctor at four." And yeah,

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that wasn't me. Like, I was just like, "Okay, I like sciences. They're cool. I like watching Star Trek." Yeah. But you didn't know that it was

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going to lead you to this. No. This this whole CEO stuff is all brand new. Like it's all just like

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again any role I my my role my mantra to myself is anything I do, I'm g just do

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it to death. That's right. And so that has kind of served me well. every position I've been in and I'll never say no. So if somebody says like

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if you call me and say moo let's let's go build a hospital. I'm going just be like yeah I'll be out there with it.

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Yeah I'll be out there with some hammers and let's build. No but seriously I just try to do everything and you know Melissa knows

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this about me too like I'll I won't say no because I want to try to get it done and try to do it. So that's Well, good for you.

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That's the thing. Yeah. though. And that's I think that that probably and that's what I write about in the book.

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Like I think that goes over so well.

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I mean, when you're talented, it's great. But we know people with talent. Yeah. That underachieve. Yep.

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But when you don't have the talent or you're a little short on the talent, I think it drives you more. Yeah. Well, so I see the book sitting

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here. Yes. I'm gonna sign a copy for you. Yep. I want that because my book is over there. But less than 1%. Yeah. Um, tell

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me what like the gist of what this is. I'm gonna read it as soon as I get home or maybe on the airplane.

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Yeah. So, so um it's not about me, but the first chapter starts with

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um me getting coached by a professional coach. Okay. Um and I was in a middle management

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position and he was like, "You got to think of career." I'm like, "I don't think of career. Wherever I'm at is where I'm at. I'm good where I'm at." I

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was in this middle middle management job. And he then he said he tried to push me and he said what do you want to do?

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And I I said I don't want to do anything but but just play along. I said okay I kind of like the CEO thing. I think

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that's kind of like a point guard. Make other people successful. Um you know kind of drive drive inspiration, drive

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impact across and lead a team. He's like there's no way. And now I'm pissed because you made me go through

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it, right? I didn't want to do it. And uh he said I said well no way. Like

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what are the chances? And so he said less than 1%. So I hold grudges and I

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named the book less than 1%. But then it but the book isn't about my story. It basically now goes into a lot of detail.

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I talk about Steph Curry. I talk about Serio Bonnelly who I put up on the Oh yes. Yes. Yes. I didn't know her

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name, but I had actually recently just seen her skating. I was telling Melissa before she had done that back flip. I

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was like, "This is the woman who got played on the ice. No one ever done that before." And like you said, she didn't

25:43

get the credit or recognition for because she was a black woman in a sport where no one had ever tried anything

25:50

like that. And so how how many how much more greatness would there be in the world if we didn't try to pick winners and

25:56

losers before the races even run? Why does he why is he telling me as my coach? He should say, "Oh, CEO, go for

26:01

it." But he's already put me in a box. Y he's already made me into something that

26:07

he doesn't even know that I am. So I wanted to write about that. Try to use data. Try to use references to say,

26:12

"Listen, stop putting people in boxes. Let's run the race. Like, let's see what

26:17

happen. Let's see who comes first." You might be surprised. So, that's a lot of projection, though, too, that I realize that people do. I'm like,

26:25

well, you may not feel like you can run the race. I'm going to grab the baton. Okay, we'll finish it.

26:30

Right. You know what I mean? I may not come first, but I'mma finish. You know, that's it. Yeah. No excuses. Yeah. So, that's Yeah. So that's uh

26:38

that's kind of my So then even the podcast I started I wrote the book and that you know did did well and obviously

26:45

Oprah had Oprah come on man where you at Oprah come on Oprah

26:50

but um but then I wanted to do the the podcast because there were all these people like

26:56

you talk to somebody and they're like like I talked to Leen is like hey that's my story uh you know I talked to um

27:02

Marty uh you know Marty's like that's my story it's my story Yeah, it's everybody has

27:08

that feeling like they didn't get an opportunity to, you know, be able to

27:13

strive for what they wanted. So that's so it's been it's been great. Yeah. Well, not even only in

27:18

entertainment has that happened to me, but also I remember I was doing an intern here in Shamberg, Illinois, and I

27:23

remember this one lady I was interning, you know what I mean? Doing my medical interns and I remember she was so nasty

27:29

to me. She was trying to get me kicked out of the program and I was like, "Oh my goodness." It was almost like because

27:34

I came in and I didn't care about failing. I didn't care if I messed up. I didn't care if I was going to make mistakes. She was like, "Do you want to scan?" And I'm like, "I do. I want to go

27:41

in there. I want" And she, it almost pissed her off, which is so weird. And so, it got to a point where she would

27:46

antagonize me. And I was sharing this with people cuz I was like, "You you a you a real interesting one. I'm afraid

27:52

you're going to literally try to get me kicked out of my program." It would she end up fast forward getting me kicked

27:58

out of the hospital, right? Um because she lied on me and thank God I had all

28:04

these witnesses and they brought me back. But then she told me she's like, "You're just not afraid, are you?" This white woman, old white woman, "You're

28:09

just not afraid, are you?" I was like, "No, I'm not." And like, "Yeah, what's she going to do?" And I'm like, "The only person that I fear is God." And when I tell you, she

28:15

looked at me, roll her eyes, and then talk to me for the rest of the time. Please don't. Um, let me finish out my job, right?

28:21

I don't know why, you know, because you see that I'm excelling and I'm young and I'm thriving. It would there, you know,

28:26

why this would be a threat. But there are people out here who are really like that, who will try to hinder you, that

28:32

will try to stop you, who will try to tell you that you are not good enough, that you are not great enough. And Huh.

28:38

If you really listen to that, you it could really destroy that direction.

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28:45

Do you hold grudges?

28:44

I know. I I tend to really let things go. You do? Yeah. For the most part, I need help with that.

28:50

I really do. And Melissa and I were just talking about this on the airplane. She was like, "How do you let things go because you're really good at this?" And

28:55

I'm like, she's like, "Why do you you just you don't care?" She says, "I don't care, right?" Which I do. She says, "I

29:00

think that you need to get tested for testosterone because she thinks that I have testosterone." And so, we were

29:06

trying to find physicians here, funnily, who we could ask um if they could testosterone test me because she thinks

29:14

that I'm not Yeah. I'm not um Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We just feminine enough.

29:20

Yeah. No, that But I I have emotions. I just I've gotten to a place in my life I've had a

29:25

very like hard life. Yeah. And I'm I I'm at a point where I just want peace.

29:31

I think holding grudges I mean it does take up space, right? I mean I I struggle with it. I I remember

29:36

I remember names like every name of anybody who slighted me. I mean I No, but you got to let them be because

29:42

you got to understand that certain people we have all been there. We are Yeah. We haven't probably always been the

29:47

nicest people. I'm sure you can attest. you weren't always the best, greatest friend and all the things and you would have wanted someone to extend that grace

29:53

to you. I know that I would. And so when people are nasty towards me, I'm like, "Okay, I'm going to say my peace. I'm going to hold you accountable, but I

29:59

still love you regardless. I'm still going to operate from a space of love." First therapy session. Yeah. I'm not here to

30:06

although there are days when I want to. I feel like that, you know, and then I'm like, "Nope. What good is that going to

30:11

do for me in my life? And what good is that going to do for you?" So, you told me about the hardest moment

30:17

of your life. Yep. Tell me about the best moment of your life. Having my children. Awesome

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30:20

Creating purpose. Someone asked me that downstairs. Yeah. And um I don't think that I would be who

30:28

I am right now if it hadn't been for my kids. I was a hoot hoot hoot. Okay. A hoot.

30:35

I'm going just be honest. I got into trouble. I was a curious kid. I wanted to experience things. If it wasn't for my kids, I don't think

30:41

that I would have So they ground you. Oh yes. And they bring me back to life.

30:46

Like I am a risk taker. I will do things that probably I should have died about

30:52

a few times in my life. Um so I have made decisions now where I'm like no mega and a no mega and a you know.

31:00

Yeah. What are their names? Mega and A. That's awesome. That's I love that. I love that name.

31:05

Yeah. Yeah. So I um Yeah. My purpose. How old? My son is 11.

31:11

Nice. My daughter will be 10 March 7th. August 7th and March 7th. Okay. I said okay. And what are they into?

31:17

My son is a boy's boy. Okay. And my daughter is a girl's girl.

31:23

Some days I'm like, "What in the world?" Um, very different. But she's very much so dancing, makeup, all the girlish

31:30

things. Are you going to use your lessons to force them to take directions? Not force them, but definitely allow

31:36

them to to choose what kind of life they want to live. I think it's important that I I don't I know that my mom, she's

31:42

Asian and so she was very private about a lot of the things that she experienced, but I wish that she would

31:48

have been more open because I think it would have hindered a lot of the mistakes that I've made in my life had

31:53

she had been open and been like, "Hey, don't" or So, I don't want to operate from that space. I want to talk to my

31:58

kids about drugs and sex and things that I feel are uncomfortable conversations

32:04

because I need them to feel safe with me first before they go into a world that does not give a damn about them. And I

32:10

mean that. That's awesome. So yeah, it's about pouring into your children. It starts at home.

32:15

Yeah. And so I'm their biggest cheerleader. I want them to be great out here and I want them to know what they have inside

32:22

of them that exists when I no longer am here. Awesome. So, so what do you what do you want to leave

32:28

the the viewers with?

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32:29

The people who are out there who are, you know, going to this podcast because they feel like

32:33

they're less than one percenters. They feel underestimated. Yeah. And continue to allow people to

32:39

underestimate you. Let that be your driving force, your fuel to get up every day to do exactly what you know you can

32:46

do because only you know what you can do. And um

32:51

yeah, show a level of gratitude for waking up every day. Every day you have a choice. You get to choose how you may

32:59

want to change things, do things a little bit differently, or maybe operate the same. But every day is a new day to

33:06

really strive to become the best you. When everybody is saying that you cannot do it, you can do it. You can do

33:14

whatever you put yourself in your mind to doing. I truly believe that it's God

33:19

has given us the tools and we just have to tap into it. That's awesome. Yeah. Well, I appreciate you. I know

33:25

that you've spent a lot of time with us today. Thank you so much. I did. It was fun. Let's do it again. I do, for the record, want to say that

33:32

April is the only one who's come on this show and interviewed me, g given me therapy and shut me up.

33:41

Well, I mean, I care. I think you're great and I hope that I could be a part of Brilliance moving forward. However

33:47

you need me, whatever you need from me in your um this world, I am willing to

33:52

be a part of. So, thank you so much. Oh, thank you so much. You made made my day. I do I do want to I want to sign a

33:57

book for you, though. Yep. I want to sign a book for you, though. Yep. You have one over there. You want this one?

34:02

I don't know. Felt special. Thank you. Thank you.

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